Value your life!
This might be the only advice you'll ever need on confidence building:
Value your life!
There is always some form of competitiveness in relations. This is the case for most social contacts we can have.
It is in our instinctual nature to just relate to another human being in terms of power or hierarchical position. This instinct is just a natural inherited pattern from the animal kingdom.
It is of course not the only pattern, but it is always there in the underlying dynamic.
When you put yourself down, you are simply self defeating yourself in this competitive game. The result will be a natural polarization of power towards the other person.
If this relating pattern is repeated systematically, your self esteem will end really low. You will feel powerless and greatly lack confidence on the long term.
Putting yourself down is self destructive!
No need to walk around with a full chest of arrogance. Taking the other extreme is just another type of distortion.
There is somewhere in between a wise and respectful balance of inner power. This inner posture of confidence is one of the keys to harmonious relating.
The occasions to experiment with this are endless. In social situations, listen to what you say about yourself, your experiences, the people you know. This will give you a clue. If you notice a systematic devaluation of your life, shift the pattern and start putting yourself in a good light.
By doing that, you will straight away bring back a healthy balance of power between you and the person you are relating to.
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